Are you Emotionally Intelligent?

Last week, I attended my cousin’s wedding in Chennai. I was from the bride side. I was sure of meeting tons of relatives, most of whom I haven’t met in ages and some for the very first time. Funny it may sound, I can safely say that I was more prepared for the wedding than the bride herself. Well, It was for the million dollar question that was going to hit me..When was I going to get married? Although, I wanted to say…” I wish I knew” .. instead with a grin.. I began to say “ Very soon” .. Well soon I got bored with that answer.. and started getting innovative…some of my answers turned into an argument and with some, it left an impression I was arrogant, some even thought I needed counselling! LMAO..There were very few - actually a handful who thought it was my personal space and not to invade it.. My respect for them just multiplied ...

This entire episode got me thinking.. It only leads me to believe that the society by enlarge craves for what they think is the missing element in the other person’s life and questions ( regardless of whether it is personal or private). One big reality show! I am sure if I was married.. the probable next question would have been when was I going to have a child..seriously! I wanted to so tell them its none of their biz.! can we not have any other meaningful conversation! Well, this I would like to clarify is not just with relatives but with acquaintances and friends too.

Most of them lack one thing in common – Emotional Intelligence!

A friend having known I attended this wedding popped this question.. “So were you harassed at the wedding?” seriously! People!!! think before you talk and the reverse process is almost always hazardous to you, cause you just lost that friend.

After almost a decade I met a friend, who was happily married with 3 kids. Thanks to Fb. 2 hours into our meeting, we were still talking about nothing but her kids. I was being the silent listener and soon realized that was her world – her 3 children. With all due respect to her world, I did not dare to meet her again.

On another instance, I happen to catch up with a friend after a really long time. She was going through a divorce. In one of our conversations she mentioned something which I will not forget for life – ‘Although your conscience knows this separation is for the best, the process is very painful. The solace is, in the bargain you will identify a few emotionally intelligent people who will walk by you and rejoice as you heal’.

May be not on the same lines but I knew exactly what she meant! And I couldn’t agree more…

What we tend to forget is each one us have different lives, lifestyles and experiences, so stop judging! There is no compliance norms defined hence we are unique in our own ways. It is never picture perfect. Life as we all know is made of crests and troughs. What matters is how we react to it! Not to just ours but others as well, their lives and experiences. So think before you talk and not the Vice versa...

Happy Living! J