Are you Emotionally Intelligent?

Last week, I attended my cousin’s wedding in Chennai. I was from the bride side. I was sure of meeting tons of relatives, most of whom I haven’t met in ages and some for the very first time. Funny it may sound, I can safely say that I was more prepared for the wedding than the bride herself. Well, It was for the million dollar question that was going to hit me..When was I going to get married? Although, I wanted to say…” I wish I knew” .. instead with a grin.. I began to say “ Very soon” .. Well soon I got bored with that answer.. and started getting innovative…some of my answers turned into an argument and with some, it left an impression I was arrogant, some even thought I needed counselling! LMAO..There were very few - actually a handful who thought it was my personal space and not to invade it.. My respect for them just multiplied ...

This entire episode got me thinking.. It only leads me to believe that the society by enlarge craves for what they think is the missing element in the other person’s life and questions ( regardless of whether it is personal or private). One big reality show! I am sure if I was married.. the probable next question would have been when was I going to have a child..seriously! I wanted to so tell them its none of their biz.! can we not have any other meaningful conversation! Well, this I would like to clarify is not just with relatives but with acquaintances and friends too.

Most of them lack one thing in common – Emotional Intelligence!

A friend having known I attended this wedding popped this question.. “So were you harassed at the wedding?” seriously! People!!! think before you talk and the reverse process is almost always hazardous to you, cause you just lost that friend.

After almost a decade I met a friend, who was happily married with 3 kids. Thanks to Fb. 2 hours into our meeting, we were still talking about nothing but her kids. I was being the silent listener and soon realized that was her world – her 3 children. With all due respect to her world, I did not dare to meet her again.

On another instance, I happen to catch up with a friend after a really long time. She was going through a divorce. In one of our conversations she mentioned something which I will not forget for life – ‘Although your conscience knows this separation is for the best, the process is very painful. The solace is, in the bargain you will identify a few emotionally intelligent people who will walk by you and rejoice as you heal’.

May be not on the same lines but I knew exactly what she meant! And I couldn’t agree more…

What we tend to forget is each one us have different lives, lifestyles and experiences, so stop judging! There is no compliance norms defined hence we are unique in our own ways. It is never picture perfect. Life as we all know is made of crests and troughs. What matters is how we react to it! Not to just ours but others as well, their lives and experiences. So think before you talk and not the Vice versa...

Happy Living! J

KAMALA...

Thatz her Name! Not until 12^th Oct 2010, did I realize how much I loved her and missed her. It was the day after my Birthday, around 6 in the morning, my mom called me. I could hear her weeping and she said it. My grand mom ( my dad’s mom) had passed away. She was 85+. I woke up with that call, I wasn’t sure if I actually heard what I had. I checked the phone’s received calls a couple of times. Yes, it was true. The Next thing I remember doing was booking the next flight to Chennai. I called my Dad, to tell him I would reach by noon.. actually to check on him. He seemed quite composed. I always thought in our family we never told each other how much we cared and loved each other. Well, I do agree actions speak for itself; but that day I felt a strong sense of disagreement to that thought. Well, duties and responsibilities also bring about certain actions. I wanted to tell my Grand mom so badly then that I loved her and I am what I am today because of her. It was late, too late. Her influence and support has been so immense that no amount of words would do justice.

My parents were both working. On reaching home the first thing from school, I remember seeing her with a glass of boost. Not a day did she miss regardless of how well or unwell she was. This went on for 17 years! She was always the first victim to our mood swings once we (my bro and me) were back from school. I have had my worst fights with her for being so protective about us, fighting with the rickshaw guy to the milk man since their delay caused a delay in her grandchildren’s schedule. I was often embarrassed with the attention. To think of it today, I only feel how blessed I am. Never did she budge from her responsibilities regardless of how harsh our fights were. I remember my mom coaxing me that change for her age was difficult to manage and it was we who have to get used to it. She often would say with a smirk, that as a child I don’t change a lot of my actions and hence she would not expect my grandmom to change. Although those words were quite annoying at that age, I hold it very close to my heart even today, it has helped me understand why elderly people behave the way they do.

While there was recap running in my mind. I got ready to catch the flight to Chennai. My uncle then called me and offered to drive me to Chennai. Next I remember, I was at my uncle’s home. He was feeling sorry for what had happened. I hated to hear it, it reminded me of the loss. It was for the first time I broke down.

We left to Chennai, reached a little post noon. I was thankful for the company of my aunt and cousin. I realized what moral support could do and how important it was. I reached home – it was silent than normal and it was killing. It was a scary silence. She was made to lie in the living room (what an irony!) in an ice-box . I wanted to wake her up and tell her that I am so Thankful and Blessed for having her in my life. I wanted to tell her – I love her, I wanted to apologise for all the hard times I gave her. Well, It was too late..but something was telling me, that she was listening to me.

I was an above-average student in school who stuck to studies and not much extra-curricular activities. It was in 8^th Standard when I was first exposed to one. My Language Teacher announced an Elocution Competition in 2 weeks. I have never tried my hands on elocution competition. So I never enrolled for it. It was the last day for enrolling, my teacher walked into the class and read out the names of the girls who had to prepare for the competition. To my shock, my name was in the list. I walked up to her and told her, I did not want to participate and she was like why? Well, not expecting that question and obviously I did not have an answer and had no choice but to prepare for it. I won the second prize. I came home with the prize. For the first time, I saw my Grandmom so happy. She was happy for the kind of competition I won. She always felt.. “Vaai maye Vellum” – meaning you have to Speakup to survive in this world. That was the beginning, I went on to win the Junior, Senior and Super Senior Interschool Elocution Competition hosted by the Leprosy Mission, Chennai. My granddad passed away when my dad was 7 yrs old. Hence she firmly believed in survival of the fittest and vouches on the importance of education. I was amused since it was more encouraging than pressurizing to excel in studies . She was my alarm clock in all my morning study sessions.. regardless of the time- be it 3 or 4 am. To have a company at that time is THE most encouraging thing! Truly one has to experience it to know what I mean…

While I was looking at her lie there, I was telling her hoping she was listening, that she was my greatest encouragement in life. To think of it, until few months ago - I have spent more time with her than my parents. In one of the conversation I had with my mom later that week, she mentioned how she had spent more time with her mom-in law than her mom and she missed her immensely. I have always been in awe of the relationship my mom and my grandmom shared. It was never the stereotypes sorts that you hear and has been abused on TV. Both of them were not perfect people – none of us are. But what worked well was the mutual respect for each other and care. My mom’s view was, I love my husband and so I respect my mom-in law and care for her. Well, my grand mom thinks – My son loves her, so I respect and care for her. I have heard this from both of them separately. I have thought then, if I get along with my mom-in law (whenever that happens!) I will dedicate it to my mom and grandmom who demonstrated it silently through all these years.

It was time when my Grandmom had to be taken for cremation. The Gents ( Relatives from rurals areas) screamed to take one final look at my Grand mom. I looked at my dad and said, I am coming with you. To which he nodded - ok. My distant relatives this time my aunties mentioned ladies don’t walk up there. I gave them a stare and said I don’t care, to which my dad responded she will be coming no arguments. The least I could do for a human being who dedicated her life for bringing up her son, followed by her grandchildren and nothing else, who reaped pleasure out of small moments in life and told us that is all is required to be happy in her own way!

Note: My Next Tatoo is a “lotus” which is Kamalam in Tamil dedicated to my Grandmom who is gonna be watching! She would love it . She loved it when I called her by her name J

Step up 3D

Step up 3D:

This movie has a couple of Firsts. To begin with this was the first 3D movie I was watching. So I obviously was quite excited about what to expect. I had watched Step up 1 and 2 both were 2D movies. Although were not quite different from each other I liked the idea of a dance based movie. Especially because it was not categorized to one form of dance, it was a free form of dance. It was basically showcasing one’s dance talent and not a traditional form of dance, which more often than not is acquired through professional training. Evolution of dance is quite an interesting transformation of art. With all due respect - for how long can we keep watching the same dance forms .We talk about new inventions in science .. I believe art also needs to evolve and take new forms and this was one step in that direction I thought. The lead pair lived up to the expectations, however it was quite obvious the male lead “Luke’ bagged the role more for his looks than his dance moves. No complaints.. I enjoyed every effort made to exhibit the 3D effect of the movie. It was time well spent.. not to forget the next first was the fact that I was watching this movie in a small city called Nottingham for the first time not quite far away from Birmingham UK. I bought a 3D glass and cant wait to watch the other movies this month for which I got a monthly pass for unlimited movies.. Next in line are Salt, Inception, Avatar, The Expendables, Knight n Day and the A Team…Don’t judge me by these string of movies, I am not a movie buff!

The Midnight Scene

After a tiresome Saturday evening of Shopping and sightseeing, I hit the bed much earlier than usual. I guess around 9.30ish. While I was in deep slumber, I heard a siren go on. It was absolutely loud like there was an orchestra playing right there in my hotel room. Totally miffed I woke up to figure out what it possibly was. There is a night club right opposite to the hotel and I was quite used to strange noises and drunken shriek in the night. However this was unusual and the sound was a thousand folds louder. I managed to grab my specs and I looked at the time, it was 12:43. I opened my hotel room door to find out what was happening. That was when it hit me, that it was the fire alarm. I watched a couple rush down at an alarming speed in their bath robe. Absolutely cheesed off knowing I had to go down too, I grabbed my jacket, mobile and my room access card and headed downstairs. And yes, elevators were a total no-no during a possible fire situation. I was in the seventh floor! There were firemen on my way down who directed me to the fire exit. With no signs of fire, I was hoping that it was not a lame fire drill! In minutes I was at the fire assembly point – which was right in front of the hotel. When I reached the ground floor, there were at least around 100 people gathered – semi clad. Most of them were either in bath robes or a towel draped around them and shivering in cold and some couples wearing outfits upside down. What fear of life and death does! I glanced through each one of them with a smirk. I observed one lady screaming at her daughter who supposedly was a bride-to be; for sleeping with her fiancé. It seems it was a sign of bad luck since it was the night before the wedding. Phew! I am sure the bride-to-be never expected a twist such as this! About an hour later we were called inside the hotel. After a ineffectual speech of apology the guests were allowed to enter their hotel rooms. The next morning there was a notice at the door – The Hotel Manager’s apology for the inconvenience caused due to the false fire alarm. I couldn’t help, but smile at the note! 

Inked !

A little more than a year ago, I accompanied my friend to the Tattoo parlor. Until then I had no clue what it was to get inked, although I had seen people with some real crazy tattoos like rangoli, some arbitrary design, their names, their lover’s names, pictures of god – what not. To be honest all this seemed quite amateurish to me only until I witnessed my friend get a professional one done. I thought it was remarkable. I guess that sparked off my interest to get inked too.
Sixteen months later, here I am in a tattoo parlor to get inked. This time on me! Although I had made up my mind on what I wanted to get inked. I was contemplating if I should get it done on my back or arm. I was very particular of the fact that the tattoo would be such that I would flaunt it only at will. My friend suggested that the first Tattoo should be in a place where I could see for myself. I thought that made sense. Today, I am so glad for that suggestion, otherwise I would have lost the opportunity to admire the Tattoo . I got inked on my left arm and it reads “Om” in devanagari script (Hindi). It wasn’t as painful as I thought it would be. It was bearable and pain totally worth it. Russell was the man with the needle gun on the mission. He took not more than 10 minutes for completing the design and shade. While I am in awe of my first tattoo, I am thinking of a second one already!

7 Years and Going Strong…..

Little did I know when I attended an interview straight out of a 10 hours night shift that it would land me in a job that lasted for close to 7 years! The job was for the position of a Technical Support Engineer for Hewlett Packard Desktop. The interview was certainly not hard to crack since I was already supporting similar and couple of more product line of HP in the org I was working for in Chennai.
With the Offer letter and a cabin bag of clothes for one week I landed in Bangalore exactly 7 years ago.
One glance at me and the first thing you’d notice is the serious look on my face and my spectacles only added to it. Although many of my friends later said it was more of a “ Don’t you dare try messing around” kinda look… yeh yeh whatever…
I stayed at my uncles place at Domlur and commuted to office at Electronics City , traffic was a killer then. Once the induction and training was complete, I was part of the first team to take calls. By then I had moved to a Paying Guest accommodation in Indira Nagar. I guess that was my first exposure to the external world. To think of it.. I learnt more at the Paying guest accommodation than in my job.
Day 1 – I moved to the PG on a late Sunday evening, my first night shift was scheduled starting that night. The room was roughly about 8*10 Sq Ft.. Exactly enough space for 2 single cot, wardrobe and a small table. It was a garage converted to a room with attached bathroom. It was termed as twin sharing. For the records that was the biggest room in the PG .
As I walked into my room I noticed my soon to be roommate munching guava.. I introduced myself … “ Hi! , I am Renu. I guess your new roommate” she munching harder responded “ Hi… I am Chitra” .. I looked around and slowly began unpacking my bag and arranging my clothes in the ward robe. Chitra had few questions for me, like if I knew Kannada and what was my educational background. The most obvious of all them was her reaction to the fact that I was working for a Call Center. Back then, it was considered as the last option if you had not cleared the Aptitude Test conducted by Software Companies from the Lala Company to biggies like Infy, Wipro, TCS. Chitra was a software programmer for a reputed firm, there was absolute pride when she mentioned that. It did not quite matter to me, since Software Industry never interested me. So after a series of information exchange, which was more of information overload to me, I started reading a novel. Although one part of me was reading the book another part of me was already making a list of things, I need to buy, to begin with source of music – the silence was killing me. I took a short nap before getting set for work.. One major disadvantage of night shift – I would feel sleepy all the time – any amount of sleep could not eradicate the constant soporific effect.
As I was getting ready, I heard my cab driver hit the horn. It was time to hussle. On hearing the honk again, I was on the lookout for my comb.. Guess What.. I couldn’t find it.. Murphy’s Law was ringing on my head – you never find what you are looking for , when you need it the most…the honk went again. I couldn’t help but now search for my roommate’s comb. That is when I realized she had locked the wardrobe and I had no clue where the key was. On hearing my cab driver’s honk , Chitra with a mild irritation asked “ Is that honk for you?” I felt so relieved on hearing her and I responded yes and quickly asked, if I could borrow her comb… In the next nano second she responded “NO” so loudly …I for a moment was wondering, if she heard what I asked for…until she continued “ I don’t lend my comb to anybody plus you might have dandruff “
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, I was like how could somebody be so rude but due to paucity of time, I was explaining how I would wash the comb and return it. To which she responded “ It is ok.. in the night who is gonna see you plus call center only na” My jaw dropped on hearing this , controlling my tears I ran to board the cab. The fact that I hadn’t combed my hair vanished now I had a bigger problem ” How am I gonna put up with a roommate so generous and for how long? “
On reaching work I called one of my friend and shot “ Guess what?” he responds in a jiffy.. “ hmmm…Let me guess –you forgot to brush and you need a gum – no problem babe.. come over”. Yeh these are some of the critical day to day activities you probably forget in night shifts especially when it is the beginning of a week coz the weekend throws you out of rhythm. To which I fumed and responded “ No I need a comb”.
Although I combed and was all prim and proper, that night at work I felt so jinxed!
I learnt my first lesson - Never seek permission…only information (which is also optional) especially if it is critical..
I started travelling to Chennai every weekend. Until after about three months I realized I was only sleeping in Chennai and was awake when my family was asleep. Also considering my budgetary constraints, slowly and steadily my weekend trips to Chennai diminished. I began to socialize with my PG mates during the weekend. It was interesting how everybody had a story to tell and their varied age group and personalities was a big WOWW to me… since seldom do we come across people of different age group and work culture to get friendly with .. In school and in college it is more or less similar mindset group…Guess that is what made life so simple in school and college.
The PG had accommodation for 16 women and I remember the occupancy was 100% at all times.
I learnt my second lesson on how you can actually be “just friendly” but not too friendly. Thanks to my Customer Service job! Chitra by then was a conquered territory (No- sharing still existed but only during her business hours;)) and none of the other PG mates could stand her sight – no surprises there!
The most talked about topic in the PG was always food. Discussions on what we had – while one PG mate would state it was Khichdi / the other would debate that it was Pongal and final verdict by aunty(PG owner) always won – It was Rice bath! (This was the place I often thought of my mom and the numerous complaints I had on her culinary skills during school and college days) ..Dining room was the only place where the entire PG House had access to Television.. The public demand won the broadcast rights – it was either M TV or Channel V most of the time.
Lesson number three –Hunger definitely supersedes taste and nutritious content! Availability certainly supersedes Quality!
Six months into the job and no weekend travel to Chennai, I was left with time to think what next?!
I certainly knew that this job was not for keeps especially the night shifts was not sustainable and I was not learning anything new any more. It had become mundane. I quickly took stock of the options and filtered down to do an MBA from ICFAI. This means weekend classes 10am – 6pm and thu/ fri evening classes 6 – 9.. for the next three years + fees 15K for three months while my take home was 9800 per month. On route to one step at a time, I sent the application. In about 15 days, I received a call from the college around 2 pm confirming for an interview with the Dean at 4.. I promptly asked if it was 4 am or pm.. the lady at the other end paused for a moment and responded 4 pm.. That was indeed Occupational Hazard!
On clearing the interview, I took the plunge thinking worst case I’l quit if I am not able to either pay the fees or cope with college and work. To attend classes in the evening , I had to take up the shift 2:30 am to 11:30 am on a permanent basis.. to begin with I requested for about 3 months and my manager readily agreed considering my performance and the shift I had chosen was mostly denied by other employees.
About 8 months into the PG, chitra moved out and I got a new roommate – Tina. She was certainly a breath of fresh air, she spoke very little English and conversed mostly in hindi and I used to respond in English since I am not fluent in Hindi. She was such a wonderful person, an affirmation that there was still hope for having a roommate you would like being around. In a 8*10 Sq ft area small gestures make a huge difference, especially when two people of different work timings shared the room. In about 4 months, she left too, and bang next day I have a new roommate - Manju was her name, she was a fresher straight out of college looking for a job. We hardly spoke to each other owing to very different work timings which was extremes and during weekends all that I did was sleep. Nevertheless you tend to create a certain bond with your roommate. We vibed well. I can no longer call her my roommate – Yo! She is my friend and we stay together today.. 
Three years later I completed my PG degree, it was definitely a struggle - totally worth it.. My class mates in B-School were such professionals and with such vast experiences. We learnt a lot from each other’s experiences more than the curriculum itself.. The little extra time I had, was spent in case study / college library, I guess I never had the time to miss anything else. All thanks to my support system, predominantly comprising of well-wishers and friends who would emerge from nowhere as guardian angels.
Biggest lesson – Be unconditional in wishing good and helping others it will certainly come back to you in multiples when you least expect it …
During these years, I was promoted from Technical Support Engineer to Project Manager in Hp. Certainly a journey I will cherish all my life – from job to career.I made few very precious friends. Another logical progression was to move out of the Paying guest Accommodation onto a small Flat closer to college (That was an experience in itself – may be food for thought for my next blog!)
Owing to growth in a different field I opted to move out to a different MNC bringing the 6 year and 10 month stint to an end…
Jan 27th 2010, I complete 7 years in Bangalore, emerging stronger…
I guess today it is ok to say “I was born and brought up in Chennai and nurtured (or shud I say spoilt!) in Bangalore...:)

101 Movies to watch before you die!!

12 Angry Men (1957)

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

The 400 Blows (1959)

8 ½ (1963)

A Hard Day’s Night (1964)

The African Queen (1952)

Alien (1979)

All About Eve (1950)

Annie Hall (1977)

Apocalypse Now (1979)

The Battle of Algiers (1967)

The Bicycle Thief (1948)

Blade Runner (1982)

Blazing Saddles (1974)

Blow Up (1966)

Blue Velvet (1986)

Bonnie and Clyde (1967)

Breathless (1960)

The Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)

Bringing Up Baby (1938)

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969)

Casablanca (1942)

Chinatown (1974)

Citizen Kane (1941)

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)

Die Hard (1988)

Do the Right Thing (1989)

Double Indemnity (1944)

Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)

Duck Soup (1933)

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982)

Enter the Dragon (1973)

The Exorcist (1973)

Fast Times At Ridgemont High (1982)

The French Connection (1971)

The Godfather (1972)

The Godfather, Part II (1974)

Goldfinger (1964)

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly (1968)

Goodfellas (1990)

The Graduate (1967)

Grand Illusion (1938)

Groundhog Day (1993)

In the Mood For Love (2001)

It Happened One Night (1934)

It’s a Wonderful Life (1946)

Jaws (1975)

King Kong (1933)

The Lady Eve (1941)

Lawrence of Arabia (1962)

The Lord of the Rings (2001,2002,2003)

M (1931)

M*A*S*H (1970)

The Maltese Falcon (1941)

The Matrix (1999)

Modern Times (1936)

Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)

National Lampoon’s Animal House (1978)

Network (1976)

Nosferatu (1922)

On the Waterfront (1954)

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest (1975)

Paths of Glory (1958)

Princess Mononoke (1999)

Psycho (1960)

Pulp Fiction (1994)

Raging Bull (1980)

Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

Raise the Red Lantern (1992)

Rashomon (1951)

Rear Window (1954)

Rebel Without a Cause (1955)

Rocky (1976)

Roman Holiday (1953)

Saving Private Ryan (1998)

Schindler’s List (1993)

The Searchers (1956)

Seven Samurai (1954)

The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Singin’ in the Rain (1952)

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937)

Some Like It Hot (1959)

The Sound of Music (1965)

Star Wars (1977)

Sunset Blvd. (1950)

Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)

The Third Man (1949)

This is Spinal Tap (1984)

Titanic (1997)

To Kill a Mockingbird (1962)

Toy Story (1995)

The Usual Suspects (1995)

Vertigo (1958)

When Harry Met Sally… (1989)

Wild Strawberries (1957)

Wings of Desire (1988)

The Wizard of Oz (1939)

Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown (1988)

The World of Apu (1959) Zorba the Greek PS: I also found an interesting list at http://the-lone-writer.blogspot.com/2006/06/101-movies-to-watch-before-you-die.html

My First Drive

I bought my first, new car couple of days back.. It is a Santro Xing – Silky Beige color.
I did not have to do alot of research, it was pretty straight forward. It was either Maruti or Hyundai . I chose Hyundai over Maruti for various reasons, to begin with I got a good deal and it was an apt first car, plus my gut feel (I believe a lot in my instinct!).
On the day of the car delivery 9th Jan '10. I was such a nervous wreck. I am not sure if it was the idea of a long awaited dream come true thing or the jitters of driving or the decision of getting a car itself.
The last couple of days I have been driving during off-peak hours, mostly late night (After 10pm) . I pulled in a friend to join me for moral support. It sure helps to keep the nervous breakdown intact. After a lot of introspection and gathering some courage (Thanks to an evil friend!) early this morning I went on a drive all by myself… To begin with.. I was shit scared… and quite nervous.. but yeh… Once I got over the initial jitters, I was doing quite decent, I should say… At one point.. I felt so wowww.. listening to music and off on my wheels .. It was a nice feeling… I hope to get better soon with my driving skills ..cant wait to take off on Long drives…
Cheers!

Census survey – Whatever!

Just this morning, while I was watching Television, the door bell rang.
At the door was this guy in formals with a writing pad. The first thing he says on seeing me“ Census survey Mam“ He then looks at his writing pad and continues “ You, your husband, children, how many?”
To begin with I was absolutely flabbergasted by his speed and English ofcourse! Conveniently ignoring his question, I interrupted and asked “ Can I see your id ?”. He gave me a shocked look which made it quite obvious that he never expected this question!! This time I wanted to repeat “ Dick head, I asked for your id” , but yeh the polite side of me, silenced the first two words..
As he was searching for his id, I looked around only to realize that there were three other gentlemen from the same Census Jazz ransacking my entire neighbourhood of all their details effortlessly, just by saying two words “ Census Survey”.
Voila! Our man found his id card.. In a glimpse I found 6 lines of Kannada on both the sides of the card in red with no photograph! Giving him the benefit of doubt I scanned through more seriously this time looking for any traces of English or hindi.. he shoots back.. “Mam, Husband, children – edhara?”
While I could feel my Blood pressure slightly raising I replied “ I do not understand Kannada – so I don’t know what is in your id card!” He replies brilliantly.. “Mam this is by Karnataka Government so onnnnly (intonation intended!) Kannada”
By then my super helpful neighbor not understanding the context, barges in! “ Don’t worry Renu.. I ‘l talk to him in Kannada and give your information “ For a moment I wished I had supernatural powers..that I could punch his nose just from where I was ..” I replied courteously to him, “No Thank you” ( I hated the courteous side in me!)
Our Dude (Son of a Gun!)not wanting to give up.. and this time louder.. yells in Kannada “ Karnataka Governmentge idu ishta agalla…”
I responded.. “ kewl.. Please go get the police , I am not giving any information without your photo id”..
May be they were from the Census Dept.. infact I hope they were from the dept they claimed to be from.. considering they have all the info abt my neighborhood… Yeh Whtever!
At the end of this entire episode.. my neighborhood stood staring at me.. like I was some kind of an outcast and terror. I know I wasn’t unreasonable…But yeh.. I was pissed this morning for the cold stares and nobody to support my cause.. Thank God to my Gym session.. helped me to dissipate this episode!

Life .... a series of Moments

Life a series of Moments…
Life is beautiful… there could be nothing simpler than that,
Life is noticing the subtle things the butterfly fluttering, the cuckoo singing, the raindrops falling, the flower blossoming;
Life is a rainbow that harnesses are dreams within the bounty of its colors…
Each second, each minute, each hour and each day is a little Life, to be cherished as the most precious thing, Life is acknowledging the supreme being, Life is the enthusiasm that envelops us all…
Life is being proud of our nation, its progress, its achievements, life is to be lived, to be enjoyed and to be laughed with, Life is sharing of the sorrows, about finding pleasures in the pain,
Life is about Love, thoughts, feelings, empathies… a series of moments…
… That’s Life… it’s we who make it beautiful… as someone rightly said… beauty is in the eyes of the Beholder… Life is Beautiful
Wish you all a 2010 filled with a series of beautiful moments… !!

What is your Rashee????

What is your Rashee???
I remember as a teenager being fascinated by Linda Good man’s thesis, that Homo sapiens can finally be classified into 12 categories... until this movie…
The movie began with Yogesh Patel coming to India, on receipt of a text message that his father had a cardiac arrest. When he lands in Mumbai, he only realizes that the entire slot was a gimmick and the idea was to get him wedded ( I’m sure we have seen this in a zillion movies!)
On reading a Gujarati Novel (whatever!) he decides to meet one girl from every zodiac sign.
Starting from Aries to Saggitarius (Phew!! 12 songs for each sunsign; not to forget the summary song, that makes it 13!!)The only saving grace of the movie, is.. Priyanka Chopra. She has done an amazing job!! The portrayal of 12 different characters is so effortless, but mind you this is only on the acting bit. The script for each of the sign was a joke and for obvious reasons biased! For example, the Libran sunsign was portrayed as Business Tycoon – hardcore professional, captures MOM (Minutes of the Meeting!) of every conservation, even when out on a date! cant do without an assistant, cut throat… PUHLEEZE… exaggeration at its ugliest peak!
Talking about the climax, the final choice is made by an uncle of the hero (makes you wonder, this could have happened at the beginning of 3 and half hours).
At the end of the movie, I felt like … Hey Director.. WTF is your Rashee!!
Looks like not only our PC but even the audience deserve to be in the Guiness Book of World Records for sitting through … :)

My Pet Dog Browny

I was catching up with Kunal over a coffee yesterday, when he mentioned about the movie “Marley & Me “ While he was narrating the story, I for a moment ran into memories of my pet Dog – Browny…
I was in my Sixth Grade at School and my brother in third. We went to the same School in Chennai. My brother and myself used to return from school by walk around 3pm everyday. On one of those days, we spotted this cute little puppy on the street not very far from home. He had lightish brown fur and was an absolute darling. We used to stop by everyday – which went on for almost week, play with the puppy for a while and return home (I had to drag my brother home on most of the occasions). This became a daily routine and we looked forward to playing with browny (by then, we had already named him).
One morning while we were just about to leave to school, we found browny at our door step. Both my brother and me jumped with joy. Playing with him we thought had become much easier than before. My parents gave us permission to play with him and feed him milk, on a condition that he was not entering home!
Guess What..Waking up early wasn’t difficult anymore. The first thing in the morning, both my brother n me used to do was, rush to the door to check on browny. He was becoming noticeably healthy and happy. Whenever he saw us...he wagged his tail at an unimaginable pace and used to curl around our feet.
We hated Exams like never before, because that left us with little time to spend with browny.
On one of those usual mornings, while my brother went to the door to wish Good morning to browny. Browny was not be found!! Both my bro and me went searching for browny everywhere. To our disappointment we could not find him and had to return home as we were getting late to school. Just then my neighbor, realizing we were looking for browny told us what had happened. Just when she finished.. both my bro and me burst into tears with absolute helplessness and anguish. The Dog Van was on the streets very early that morning , chained browny and taken him away (Stray dogs on the streets are often being taken away by the Local Municipality and exterminated). My parents having realized that no way we were going to get browny back started pacifying us – they even promised to get us another puppy…and you think it helped?!? Not remotely… We left to school with a heavy heart.
My father by then realized how impossible it was for him to convince us.
Later that evening, my Grandma narrated to us what had happened after we left to school.
My Dad called the local MLA (our family friend) and talked about this. For him, the whole episode sounded like a childish joke, because my father was insisting the MLA to call up the Municipality to put in a word, while dad was there.
When Dad visited the Local Municipality, he was appalled to find atleast about 50 + stray dogs of all breeds, sizes , disease and disorders chained in a cell. All of them had their mouth tied tight with a chain. Having confirmed that all of them were tightly tied, my dad stepped into the cell to identify browny (hoping he was there and considering there were quite a few look alikes!)
On seeing my Dad..Browny came wagging his tail with blood dripping from his mouth (the chain was too tight for him). Dad then picked up browny put him in a basket and got him home. We treated him with medicines and bandage.
Browny gained entry into our home and now became family … and yes my bro and me screamed in absolute zenith of joy for browny and for our World’s Best Dad.
Browny enjoyed the cynosure. He never let any strangers home and was a friendly dog for the neighbourhood. Everything seemed alright for the next six months until one day we noticed browny’s leg twitching. We took him to the Vet. That was my first visit to the Veterinary Hospital it had the reputation of being the largest one in Tamilnadu. It was a new experience – Registering the patient, fixing an appointment for consultation and the various specialist Dept. Browny was taken to the Neurology Dept. He was diagnosed of Distemper. He was supposed to have had vaccinations in the first and third months of his birth, which we were totally unaware of. The Doctor diagnosed it to be a terminal illness and asked us to start counting his days - even worse, he suggested mercy –killing since it could be quite painful to see browny go through the illness.
I broke down almost immediately. My Dad got me and browny to the parking wondering what to do next, he knew everyone in the family would be shattered on hearing this. I asked my Dad to hold on and ran to the Doc. Next I remember asking the Doc, what will take to keep him alive? The doc with sarcasm responded you will have to bring browny for vaccination everyday for a complete month – which again she declared was only a try and not a guaranteed cure. With a smirk she then said, for which you will have to register at the Vet @ 7.00 am everyday. I for sure made up my mind, that I would do all it takes to save browny.
My school started at 8.30 am. My dad was very clear that this was not going to affect my school timings. I was up early everyday – not a day did we miss our appointment. In the next 10 days we knew almost everybody in the hospital. I met patients like Cats, Dogs, pigeons, horses, cow, Buffalo, parrots – you name it! Of various breed, color, sizes and disorder.

On completing one month of vaccination, browny showed significant improvement. Though Browny was not completely cured, he was fit for survival, the glorious day, I still remember.
He grew up as an average built Alsatian. I always felt, his eyes had immense power and his look of gratitude, I’l never forget. Even today, I cant help shedding a tear, when I think of him. He did early morning and late night studies with me in the terrace. My source of protection and strength. He studied Engineering too…learnt from my narration. He knew all my friends, listened to all my stories – an amazing listener, knew my mood swings –my best friend. By far the most well disciplined pet..yes, I have another pet dog called blacky (he is a Labrador!) a complete opposite to Browny – absolutely mischievous, craves for attention, anything dropped on the floor would be in pieces in a blink…
Whenever my mom is posed with the question of how many children she has, without giving a second thought would respond, 4; Two; Two-legged and Two; Four-legged, she wouldn’t stop there.. she would continue to say that the 2, four-legged are far more obedient and less trouble-some than the other two..
Browny was 13 years old, I had moved to Bangalore for work.
On one of my routine visits to Chennai, my mom mentioned that Browny had been quite ill lately; he was growing old and weak. The best thing about him, regardless of how ill – weak he would be.. he would gather all his strength to wag his tail and walk towards me. On that day strangely he cried… I had no clue why.. I wiped his tears cuddled him, spoke to him for a while, fed him with some milk and went to sleep since I had travelled the earlier night..

My bro woke me up.. and asked me to come and see browny.

In half asleep I walked to the living room only to see him on the floor lie breathless – he had passed away… Just then my mom mentioned, he was waiting all the while only to see me one last time, with tears rolling down her cheek and now mine while I draft this in memory of my Pet Browny!!

My first day @ work in 2009…

After a vacation of about 2 weeks (the shortest 2 weeks I ever encountered!) … I have to report to work tomorrow (which is in less than 10 hours from now!).
Reminds me of my school days….Sunday evening, I would be ready with my school bag packed and set, a final glance to ensure, I ‘ve completed all the assignments / homework, my shoes spic and span, and uniform ironed. All of this with significant enthusiasm that I’d be meeting my friends, new lessons, PT classes with a tinge of sadness of having to wake up early to school and school itself…
Today … the very thought of having to get back to work after vacation… sounds like a nightmare… to a certain extent I have a similar checklist (includes the assignment part of it – to the power of 10!)…however the feeling is not remotely similar… this time, I haven’t completed my assignments! :P
For all you students... Who are thinking that your teachers are Tough! Wait until you get a Boss :p…

New Year... 2009

It was 31st Dec 2008, around 11.50 pm. I prepared myself for a short prayer Iike I always do every year. I don’t exactly remember when I developed this habit, I guess since 8th Std. My favorite English Teacher had once said you could have the best New Year if you begin with a prayer and ever since it has become a practice. It has indeed had a very comforting effect hence I never tried anything different. Just when I completed my prayer, my mobile rang, it was my best friend from Boston - we have been best friends for the last two decades! We wished each other. It was quite an emotional moment. Though our conversation was brief, it meant a lot to me. I called home hoping my parents would be awake. I wished my parents. And Phew! Network gave up on me, I could not make calls. In fact this was expected considering the New Years' rush and the network bandwidth. I sent few text messages and replied to some. I had one more call to make – I was hoping, the network would be up. I’m quite stubborn that way, if I have to get through to someone; I have to; no matter what. I used the landline – and yes I got connected. I wished a close friend who was off in Goa celebrating New Year.
That morning, my close buddy from Chennai gave me my first wake-up call this year. It was time for few more calls to be made like my grandparents, my uncle and my brother. The joy I receive in wishing loved ones is something, I can never explain. During the course of the day, I managed to wish family and friends.
For some reason, I feel this New Year 2009 is going to be a great one and my instinct has always worked - though Bejan Daruwala seems to have a different view, but hey that is his point of view!
To begin with, I’m sponsoring a child through World Vision something I always wanted to. Looking forward to a year of best moments I would always cherish, happiness and success rightly deserved.

To all my dear friends,
Let the New Year begin with Joy and bring all the success and finest moments ever, Wish you all a Very Happy and Prosperous New Year…:)

Myopia...

I’m one of the few to be blessed with myopia since I was 12 years of age ( Phew! I recently completed my 15th year successfully! ) All that I remember when I was first diagnosed with myopia.. was that I was so damn happy, only because I would finally look studious with that accessory (also known as spectacles) if not one ;)
For the unlucky others, who did not get a chance or yet to experience this physics of vision… a quick insight of myopia – also known as shortsight is when objects at a distance appear blurred, however the nearby objects would appear clearly. The degree of how blurred the distant object is denoted by a negative number (-2.75)… the higher is the negative number the closer you are to distant object blindness (I know, you may not accept it mathematically but hey this is physics!)…
In the last 15 years, I have managed to experiment with this default accessory of mine. My specs has been of all types, shapes, sizes and colors. To quote a few- Shell frame, metal, glass, optic fiber, frameless, the huge specs that would almost cover my face – I wonder what I was thinking when I chose that one! I guess I did not have much of a choice, the bill was paid by my Dad.. :)
I wonder if can I call my spectacles – an accessory anymore because it’s now part of me?!!? For all those who are wondering how is that possible, here you go… I have gone to sleep with my specs – thanks to my mom , she managed to save it all the time. I have splashed water on my face, with my specs on, in an attempt to wash my face and when I opened my eyes I almost thought I was turning blind, because all that I saw was a blurry /watery image in front of me. There have also been days, when I had wished my glasses have wipers like that of cars on those rainy days, when I used to return home from school riding my cycle, drenched and with a mild frustration of my ability.
On completion of my 15th year, my friend insisted that I try contact lens. I wasn’t really open to the idea, since I always thought it was quite scary for a foreign element to be seated on my cornea, instead I’d preferred the one that sits on my nose.
My friend not wanting to give up, persuaded me to buy a pair of contact lens…
For all those who are considering to switch to contact lens, I think it’s my moral responsibility to share my stint with that wonder…After having successfully postponed this act for about 3 days from the day of purchase, one evening I opened the contact lens pack – it was soaked in a solution called the lens solution.. It could remain soaked until 2013 unused- atleast that is what the pack read. My friend showed me a demo on how to place that thin circular, curvy transparent thingy called lens on the cornea. She took exactly about 20 seconds to place each of them on her cornea, she blinked about 5 times and voila it had set… It was now my turn… with not just butterflies, but bulls and bears in my stomach, it took roughly about three tries, before I managed to pick up the lens with my ring finger (Don’t ask me why ring finger! It was reflex action, I guess I thought I was picking kumkum – ignorant me!) After multiple attempts which took about 15 minutes, I realized that the ring finger was a wrong choice. And in all the tries in front of the mirror, I had to moisture the lens – soak it in the solution, as it would dry due to exposure to air. This time, I picked the lens in my index finger – as per the beginner’s protocol and my friend’s instruction to learners.
In the process of trying to fit the lens, my eye started watering, my friend who was witnessing my struggle, promptly responded that the lens was waterproof, so it was ok to cry wearing them. She seemed hell bent in me trying contact lens although I felt like boxing her at that moment.
After the tear act, I finally managed to place the lens on my cornea.. Wowww!! what a relief… finally the effort and my tears paid off… I looked around to see if the lens had an effect on my vision. To my amazement, the objects looked clear through one eye, while blurred through the other.. that was the first time, I experienced something like that…After a short break of about 15 mins… It was time for the other lens.. I tried and tried and tried finally gave up.. I looked at the time it was around 12 am… I managed to take the other lens off my eyes in a jiffy and I hit the bed… I haven’t tried them ever since…
Guess what… I realized I’m happy with my Titan Eye wear.. so what if I’m unable to shop goggles … Yes I have to get them powered before I use them… So !!?!

God, Are you listening....?!!?

It was one of those mornings around 8ish, I guess; My bike failed to start, so I was walking to the Gym -not wanting to miss my work out!
On the other side of the road, there was this girl, who caught my attention. She was around 5 to 6 years old, in her school uniform with her school bag on her back and a lunch bag (water bottle +lunch box) walking all alone. I recognized from her uniform that she was going to the local Government school.
I was appalled to see her sob!!
While I was wondering, why she was possibly crying, it was too difficult for me to ignore this tiny tot; hence I walked at a faster pace, crossed the road to catch up with her. Although I was trying to make every possible attempt to strike a conversation with her, she was just not paying heed instead she started running. I was feeling extremely guilty to watch the child with the school bag and lunch box, run crying.
To add to my guilt she tripped and fell flat on the muddy- rugged ground (road was absolutely – nonexistent!).
By now I felt absolutely responsible!
I ran to help the child pick up all her stuff. ..
The dog eared books were all over the place, I arranged the books, in the bag that had no closure. The zip had given way. I then picked up the lunch box, which was very neatly cleaned with no sign of food in it!! I turned to look at the child confused, wondering why somebody would send an empty lunch box.. That is when I realized why the child was crying.. I figured out what she was mentioning…
The child was hungry…!!
I felt torn into pieces… with the little money I had, I bought her a biscuit pack. She took the biscuit pack, wiped her tears and smiled …
In my limited memory..till date... That was the greatest satisfaction, I ever experienced!!
I bid the tiny tot good bye to school hoping that somebody would take care of her rest of the meals for the day..
And what about her living!!!?!? God are you listening??!

A Stranger who made a difference...

It was a bright Monday morning... Regardless of how bright it is… For me Mondays’ generally require lot more motivation to get to work than any normal working day...It was one of those days, when I clearly knew I was running late for the 11.10am shuttle that I normally take to EC (Oh that was Electronics City!)…
It takes roughly about 10 minutes to get to the bus stop from my home…
A quick check on my hand luggage to office (it really is, you would agree in a moment!)
Gym bag – check; Laptop Bag – check; mobile – check; ID card – Check; IPod – check; keys – check;
By the time I left home it was a little past 11 am… my pace increased by twice to what it normally is, since I clearly knew I would miss my shuttle otherwise – which means either wait another hour to board the next shuttle or chase to another bus stop about 2 kms away to try my luck boarding another shuttle…
While I walked about 2 mins… there was this auto which stopped right in front of me… the driver smiled saying... “ Mam Naan drop panren –main road bus stop dhane? vaanga.. “ – Stop !! A quick rewind…
Few days back… I had injured my leg (soft tissue stretch – according to my physiotherapist).That was roughly about a week, when I used to hire auto to reach the bus stop.. On one of those days.. I had taken an auto. I got into a conversation with the driver (which I normally do when I’m travelling alone and when I’m in the mood to talk ofcourse!). The conversation got interesting when the driver started talking about his family. There was an obvious glow in his face, when he spoke about his 5 year old daughter. The conversation had to come to end, as my stop had arrived. I offered him the meter fare and got down.
It was the same driver, who offered to drop me at the Bus stop. Running short of time , without much thought and a willingness to pay even double the fare.. I boarded the auto.
Guess what!! to my bad luck, while the auto was jus reaching the stop, I saw my office bus pass by. ..
Tensed, I asked the driver to chase the bus to the next stopping…
Phew!!! I reached the next bus stop right in time to board the bus.. which is approx 2 kms away…
I quickly searched for my Wallet from my hand luggage to pay the driver….
And you know whatttt?!?!… the auto driver refused to take the fare…
While I stared at him confused.. he replied in Kannada… “ Mam, I offered to drop you.. you never asked for a drop – so no fare.. please board the bus, it is waiting for you”
With a heavy heart , and utmost guilt I boarded my office bus…